Till Death Do Us Part

2 Timothy 4:3

“For the time will come when men will not put up with sound doctrine.  Instead, to suit their own desires they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear.” 

Marriage is difficult.  Even under the best of circumstances, there are challenges for every couple.  Add an illness like Alzheimer’s or cancer, or an accident that leaves one partner disabled, and the stress grows exponentially.  That’s why God requires us to enter into a covenant with our spouse.  When we say “I do”, we are promising that we will stay united with our spouse in sickness or health, for richer or poorer.  It comes off the lips so easily on our wedding day but what happens when we are faced with the realities of this promise?  Countless couples are doing just that. 

This week,(9/15/11) Pat Robertson said that Alzheimer’s is a "kind of death" that makes divorce justifiable.   On air, he counseled a man that it would be understandable to divorce his wife and marry another woman. The Alzheimers had altered the wife he knew.  She was nothing like the woman he had fallen in love with years ago.  She couldn’t remember him anymore.  

Robertson’s advice is completely contradictory to everything we read in scripture.  Marriage is a depiction of Christ’s sacrificial love for us, his church. (Ephesians 5:25-32)  He promises never to leave us or forsake us. (Hebrews 13:5)  He loves us unconditionally.  Even when we have no capacity to love Him back.  In fact, that is the way we came to Him- completely without merit.  Nothing to offer.   

            If God only loved us when we were perfect and loveable, who could stand?  His glory is made manifest in the fact that He loves us, not because of the righteous things we have done but because of His mercy.  (Titus 3:5)  God is love.  Love was demonstrated to us in the crucified form of Christ.  He sacrificed his very life for His Bride, who could give nothing in return.  Our marriages should be reflections of this profound mystery. 

            In Matthew 25, Jesus tells his disciples that when they demonstrated servant hearted, sacrificial love to the “least of these” they were doing it unto Him.  He also had a harsh rebuke and condemnation for those who chose to live for self.    We are created to bring Him glory but we don’t get to decide how He will demonstrate it in our lives. Trials are God’s way of making us mature and complete, lacking nothing. (James 1:2-4)  This is a mystery, but instead of looking for a way out of a trial  we should look to the Lord to walk us through the trial so that He can be glorified all the more.           

            Husbands are told to love their wives as Christ loved the church.   (Ephesians 5:25)   This analogy makes it clear that divorce because of sickness, irreconcilable differences, decreased capacity to demonstrate love, lack of usefulness, or falling “out of love”, is not an option for believers.